See if this sounds familiar
I’ve had a specific goal for a long time. I think about it daily, but instead of taking any fruitful action, I only think about it.
Truthfully, it’s more accurate to say that I obsess over it.
I think about how I should have started sooner towards my goal. I shame myself for not starting when I first thought about it. “I knew I should have started back then. “
Sometimes, I blame others for my inaction rather than keep myself in the hot seat.
“Why hasn’t HE taken over my goal if he sees me not doing anything about it? Why do I have to be the one to work on this goal myself?”
Then, I convince myself it’s too late and my goal is no longer achievable. I will end up “living in a van down by the river!”
All the while, I’m still doing nothing actionable to achieve this goal.
I see where I want to go.
I even know how to get there in most ways—or at least I know several people who would gladly help me come up with a solid plan to make my goal a reality. What I am saying is that I have the resources to do it.
But even with the destination in mind and the path to get there in front of me, I take what I call an “exit ramp” and go nowhere for yet another day.
Rinse and repeat.
What is an “Exit Ramp”?
An exit ramp is an easy place for me to leave the path of forward progress, and I feel pretty justified in doing so.
In this instance, an exit ramp is the thing I fixate on instead of taking steps toward my goal. It’s an excuse but a carefully crafted, moderately defensible excuse. It is an excuse with some plausibility so that most people would not argue with it too much. But make no mistake; it’s an excuse nonetheless.
The Joke
I am incredibly skilled at creating legitimate-sounding excuses derailing my goals. In fact, I could put my abilities of justification up against anybody and feel confident in my ability to come out as the winner. It’s taken me decades to balance this precarious relationship between inaction and self-confidence. Sure, some call this delusional, but what do they know!? 😉
What makes this skill even worse is that I speak with such authority that people just believe me and tend to agree that my excuse is legitimate. Then, I feel even more justified in my excuse.
What I’m trying to tell you is that I have perfected the process of not achieving my goals and still feeling awesome about myself.
But…the joke is on me.
The Challenge
What if this was the year I eliminated the time I usually spend coming up with these exit ramps? What if I just did the thing instead of spinning my wheels?
The Change
I approached my goal-setting process for 2025 a little differently. I added the component of rooting my goals in a larger thesis or “why” statement. This overarching theme for my goals this year is:
“As healthy as possible, as peaceful as possible, as joyful as possible…so that I can live out my purpose for as long as possible.”
All of my procrastination and spinning my wheels really shoot the “peaceful as possible” part right in the foot. For me, procrastination really amplifies my anxiety because it requires rumination and obsession.
Then I get exhausted because anxiety zaps my energy. And then I need a nap from doing nothing. (Oh my gosh. This is so painfully true of me. Bless my heart.)
As is the function of any thesis statement, I ensured each item in my yearly goal list tied back to my why. This provided continuity and cohesion to my goals that had been lacking in previous years. Plus, it just made a lot of sense to me as someone who likes to write.
Next Steps:
What about you? What are the ‘exit ramps’ you find yourself taking? What steps can you take today to return to the road toward your goals?
Make a list of legitimate-sounding excuses you tell yourself and others to keep you on the perpetual exit ramp instead of forging ahead toward the life you want.
Here’s a tip: Next time you feel yourself reaching for an exit ramp, pause and ask yourself, “Does this choice align with my bigger “why”?” If not, redirect your energy toward a small, achievable step forward.
Closing thoughts
When your goals are anchored in your ‘why,’ each small step forward becomes a meaningful act of self-care and purpose. And isn’t that worth skipping the exit ramp for?
This year, let’s stop spinning our wheels and start driving toward the lives we envision for ourselves. Your destination is closer than you think—one step at a time, with your ‘why’ guiding the way.
