Relationship problems are a common reason people pursue therapy. And not surprisingly, many clients have been more than a little frustrated they are the ones talking to me, when clearly their partner or family member is the one with the problem! They have nagged and scolded and … [Read more...] about Why Should I Go to Therapy When He (She) Is the Problem?!
What I Learned in Chemical Plants That Mirrors the Marriage Relationship Safe plant operations are like marriage? You’ve got to be kidding! How in the world do we find the parallels between working in the chemical industry and the marriage relationship? I am so glad you … [Read more...] about Compliance vs. Commitment in Your Marriage: Which Defines You?
“You can’t talk yourself out of problems you behave yourself into.” Exactly. I read this quote out of Stephen Covey’s book, Seven Habits of Effective People where he describes his concept of an emotional bank account. It stood out to me because I have had to … [Read more...] about Broken Trust Is Not Easily Restored
The Pattern: Argument Amnesia Ask yourself this question: How often do my spouse and I argue about something, and then the next day I can’t remember what triggered the argument? I certainly remember the tension and the anger or distance I felt, but I … [Read more...] about Why Couples Do Not Recover from Arguments Well
Be Careful What You Believe to be True. Unfortunately, many of the Spiritual “truths” that we are convinced are in Scripture are actually the result of what we hear when we are growing up, what makes sense to us, and (too often) what we see in movies and … [Read more...] about Four “Biblical” Myths That are NOT in the Bible
“I have said I am sorry. How many times do I have to say it?” Does this sound familiar? And often either the husband or the wife is the “usual” one to come back and apologize for some infraction, argument, tone of voice, or conflict. And often the one who is … [Read more...] about Five Reasons Why Your Apologies Don’t Work (and Seven Ways to Make it Effective)